personal projects, babeland sponsorship, and my “life less bullshit” manifesto

Here’s a discrepancy for you: I believe so strongly in the power of personal projects, and yet it’s these personal projects that always get pushed aside to make room for “more important things.” Truthfully, it’s not that they get pushed aside for more important things, it’s that they get pushed aside for more urgent things, and I keep trying to remind myself that just because something seems urgent doesn’t mean that it’s actually important.

My biggest personal project is my Life List, which is an ever-growing, ever-changing reflection of the things I want to experience and accomplish throughout my life. At the beginning of 2011, the kickass people at Babeland jumped on board to (very generously) sponsor some of the sexier and more self-loving items on my list, and now, four months into the year, my partnership with Babeland has inspired me to check off one of the Life List items I never expected to get to this year, #95 Write a personal manifesto.

First, Babeland sponsored my plan to give twenty “just because” gifts to 20 random people by letting me send a bright pink vibrator to 20 bloggers all across America. Then, they sponsored me treating myself nicely by stocking my bathroom full of incredibly delicious body products, like chocolate body oil and champagne bath fizz. They also helped me pay more attention to the details of my day to day life by giving me a new digital camera for my photo-a-day project, which I’m so excited to post about in more detail next week. In the process of doing each of these things, though, I absentmindedly found myself making notes about my life, my priorities, and my biggest truths, and it wasn’t until I was a few pages into the notes that I realized what I was doing; I was writing my personal manifesto. My “life less bullshit” manifesto, actually.

I’ve always been drawn to manifesto-style writing. There’s just something so ravishing and magical about getting to read the heart of someone else’s life. I love exploring the deep truths that resonate most for other people, and then reflecting on where their truths fit into mine.

If you have your own manifesto, I’d love to read it. If you haven’t written one yet, I think you should. We all need a little something to remind us of what’s most important, right? Having a written declaration of all the advice you want to give yourself on both your best and your worst days is the only way I know to stay focused on what’s important. And focusing on what’s really important is how we avoid getting dragged into the endless parade of all those things that seem important, but are actually just annoying distractions that keep us from being our most fantastically awesome selves.

So do it! Write a manifesto of true beliefs, and send it to me. And, in the meantime, here’s mine:

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The Life Less Bullshit Manifesto

Stop freaking out. Things are always worse in your head than they are in real life. Everything is going to be okay. No really, it is. Stop comparing yourself to everyone else. This is your life, start living it.

Be more you.

Find what inspires you, and mainline it. Find what moves you, and move. Find what keeps you up all night, and stay up all night. Get worked into the frenzy of being who you really are.

Decide what’s of ultimate importance, and ignore everything else. Only do work that you believe is great work. If you feel lost, join something bigger than yourself. Appreciate being a part of something, instead of stressing to be all of anything.

When you don’t know where to start, just start. If you don’t know where the beginning is, start in the middle, or start at the end. Just start, and keep going. Take the biggest risk you can think of. Take another. And another. It doesn’t matter if you don’t have enough time, or enough money. What’s “enough,” anyway? Forget about the big picture and let yourself wander aimlessly among the details. You don’t need a plan or a treasure map or a neon street sign, and you certainly don’t need to be the best. All you need to do is start, and then make one good decision after another. Being the best never comes right away.

Pay attention to the moments in which you feel pure joy. Express gratitude, out loud and often. Stop checking your email in bed; there are better ways to start the day. Read memoirs. Read fiction. Read poetry. Never stop reading. Go outside, even in bad weather. Buy yourself a present, even without an occasion. Wear pink shoes, even if they don’t match. You never need a reason to do what you truly feel like doing.

Stretch your mind, and your body, and your soul. Move and bend and jump and push; be faster and stronger and healthier than you were yesterday. Pursue growth. Listen to all the reasons you shouldn’t go, and then go anyway. Let yourself fall into the hole – there’s always a way out. Let other people help you out.

Choose a personal anthem and give yourself a lapdance. Make up words, and use them. Identify what you need to say, and say it. Be loud about the things that matter.

Set healthy boundaries. Work with people you respect. Value your time and your work and your creative energy. Put a price on what you create, and charge it. Show up more often. Ask interesting questions. Share more than you’re comfortable sharing. Write down your core beliefs and read them every day.

Find your people, the ones who make you feel good and beautiful and whole. Treat them like they matter, because they do. Treat yourself like you matter, because you do. Don’t be afraid to let people see that you are messy and flawed. We’re all messy and flawed.

Stop wanting what you don’t want. Define life for yourself. Decide what it means to you to be happy and dedicated and alive. Live by your own definitions. Pick something to perfect, and perfect it. Pick something to stop caring about, and refuse to give a shit. Don’t waste your energy on things just because other people do. Spend less time obsessing and more time actually doing. Forget about yesterday. Stop over-planning for tomorrow. Yesterday and tomorrow are just romanticized versions of today.

Choose today.

Posted in: babeland sponsorship, big giant life list, personal growth and shit