deliciously vulgar
From the category archives:
It’s not that I didn’t know where Alaska was. Okay okay, fine. FINE. I didn’t know where Alaska was. I blame the placemat. Do you remember those placemats? The ones that had a map of the United States on one side and a blank map on the other side and the point was to study [...]
{ 51 comments }
Of course I’m still interning for The Bloggess. No way she’ll ever be able to get rid of me now. From: Nicole The Intern To: Jenny The Bloggess Subject: new house. dead fetus. correlation between the two. The thing about Bolivia is that you can buy dried llama fetuses at something called the Witches’ Market [...]
{ 46 comments }
One of my favorite scenarios is when I’m having a conversation with someone and a ridiculous thing comes up and the other person is all, “You couldn’t pay me to do that,” because that’s my cue to call their over-exaggerating bluff and begin the cash-in-a-duffel-bag game. I’m all, “Oh really? What if someone seriously gave [...]
{ 37 comments }
In case we somehow wind up living together one day, there are a few things you should know about me. Number one is that I bake excellent brownies. Number two is that I’ll likely make your bed whenever you’re not home, whether you want me to or not. And number three is that there isn’t [...]
{ 65 comments }
I take my phone with me to the bathroom. Do you do that? Is it just me? Am I the only one who’s self important enough to think that the world will explode if I miss a call during the minute and a half that I’m going to the bathroom? I honestly don’t know why [...]
{ 33 comments }
